Enchiridion by Epictetus
Translated by Stoic Pal.com (2024)
1
There are certain things in life you can control and others you can’t. Simple as that. So, what are you able to control? Your opinions, your desires, your actions. Basically, everything that’s up to you. And what’s beyond your control? Your health, your reputation, your boss, the outside weather, and all the things you don’t get to call the shots on.
The stuff you control is your kingdom. It’s free and untouchable, and no one can mess with it unless you let them. But the stuff you can’t control? That’s like playing with someone else’s toy: it’s not yours, and it can be taken away or damaged at any point.
So, if you’re living in la-la land, thinking you can control the uncontrollable, you’re setting yourself up for a world of frustration. You’ll whine, you’ll freak out, and you’ll be pointing fingers at everyone, including the universe. But, if you get real and understand that your stuff is your stuff, and other people’s stuff is, well, not yours, then you’re in for a smoother ride. Nobody can push you around, you won’t blame others, and you’ll be doing things your way. No drama, no enemies, no harm.
Now, aiming for this mindset isn’t a walk in the park. You’ll have to work for it, and it might mean letting go of some things; like obsessing over status or wealth. If you chase after what you can’t control (like fame, money, or power) while also trying to hold onto your peace of mind, you’re going to end up losing both. So, when some crappy thought or situation comes your way, tell yourself, ‘This is just a perception, not the reality.’ Ask yourself, ‘Is this thing in my control or not?’ If it’s something you can’t control, like the weather, someone else’s mood, or the stock market, then give it the cold shoulder and respond with ‘Not my circus, not my monkeys.’
2
Desires are like those shiny ads promising you the dream life, but they’re often full of crap. You chase what you want, and when it slips through your fingers, you feel like the universe just gave you the middle finger.
And those things you try to dodge? Let’s call them “no-nos.” You bend over backwards to avoid them, but when you inevitably bump into one, it feels like a slap in the face. So if you’re losing sleep over avoiding stuff out of your control, like sickness, poverty, or the big D (death), you’re basically signing up for frustration and misery.
So, what to do? Stop giving a damn about the stuff you can’t control. Shift that energy to dodging the real BS in life, the stuff that’s totally under your control. And those desires? Keep them in check. Going after things you can’t control is like trying to grab smoke with your bare hands – very annoying and frustrating.
3
Everything from your favourite coffee mug to the people you love: they’re all pieces of this wild, beautiful, and totally chaotic thing called life. And you must remember what all these things really are.
Let’s start simple. That coffee cup you adore? It’s just a cup. If it shatters, don’t sweat it. It’s not the end of the world. Similarly, when you’re giving a big hug to your kid or your partner, remember, they’re human. And humans? We’ve all got an expiration date. So if something happens to them, it’s going to hurt like hell, but you’ll be able to get through it.
This is all about seeing things for what they really are. Don’t forget the real nature of things and people you care about. It’s not about being pessimistic; it’s about being prepared and realistic. That way, when life throws curveballs – and it will – you’re not knocked off your feet. So, go ahead, love your coffee cup, squeeze your loved ones like there’s no tomorrow, but always keep one foot on the ground.
4
Before you do anything, always think about the broader context of the situation. For example, if you are going to a coffee shop, be ready for the chaos: baristas mixing up orders, people bumping into you, some dude accidentally spilling their latte on your shoes, and, of course, the Wi-Fi being down. Before you step foot in there, tell yourself, “Alright, I’m here for my coffee, but I’m also here to keep my cool, no matter what happens.” That way, when things inevitably go sideways, you won’t lose your mind.
This mindset isn’t limited to coffee shop scenarios. It’s a universal approach. Stuck in traffic? It’s not just about driving; it’s about mastering the art of patience towards other drivers. Facing a slow internet connection? Remember, you’re not just browsing; you’re practicing the sacred art of not throwing your router out the window.
The key here is to prepare yourself for life’s little annoyances. It’s not just about ticking off tasks on your list. It’s about staying cool, composed, and unshaken amidst the mayhem. And this is how you keep your cool in our crazy, unpredictable world – by expecting the chaos but not letting it get under your skin.
5
Hey, guess what? It’s not the stuff happening around you that’s screwing with your head. It’s the crappy judgments you’re making about those things. Take death, for instance. This big, spooky thing everyone’s terrified of. But was someone like Socrates freaking out over it? Nope. And why’s that? Because the real boogeyman is in your head, thinking death is the ultimate bad guy. It’s all the crazy stories we tell ourselves about death that make it seem like the worst thing ever. So, when things go sideways, or you’re feeling stressed or bummed, don’t play the blame game. It’s not about what’s happening or who’s doing what; it’s about how you’re viewing things.
Blaming others for your troubles? That’s rookie behaviour. Starting to realize that it’s your own thinking that’s creating the chaos? Congrats, you’re moving up in the world. Got to the point where you look in the mirror and say, “Maybe it’s my own thinking that’s out of whack.” Dude, you’ve reached the advanced status. And when you’re really getting wise to how things work, you stop playing the blame game altogether. It’s not about finger-pointing, whether it’s at someone else or yourself. It’s about understanding that sometimes, stuff just happens.
It’s all about the lenses you’re looking through. Change the lens, change the game. Remember, it’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that really counts.
6
Stop bragging about stuff that isn’t even yours. Imagine flexing on Instagram because your friend has a nice gaming setup. Sure, it’s cool, but it’s not your setup, right? Or imagine if your dog started bragging, “Hey, look at me, I’m gorgeous.” That’s kind of okay, because, well, it’s the dog’s own beauty. But when you start boasting about having a beautiful dog, you’re just riding on its good looks. You’re just bragging about something cool that belongs to someone else, or in this case, your dog.
What’s really yours then? It’s the way you process stuff that happens to you. That’s it. So, when you’re in sync with nature, rolling with life’s punches and handling your impressions and judgements like a champ, that’s when you should give yourself a pat on the back. Because at that point, you’re actually proud of something legit – something that’s genuinely a part of you. Your responses, your cool in a crisis, your creativity in chaos; that’s the stuff to really be proud of.
7
Think of life like a short break during a long bus ride. You’ve got a little time to grab a snack, hit the restroom, and maybe play a game or two. But you’ve got to stay alert. When the driver honks, signalling it’s time to roll, you’ve got to drop whatever you’re doing and get back on the bus. Mid-bite into a burger or halfway through a hilarious Youtube video? Tough luck – you’ve got to drop it and move on.
Now replace the snacks and games with stuff like relationships or a job you’re totally into. They’re great, enjoy them to the max. But when life calls – and it will – you’ve got to be ready to let go and jump back on the bus, no looking back. If you’re getting old, this is even more crucial. You should be prepped to jump back into life’s journey at the drop of a hat. It’s all about living in the now, but also not getting so caught up that you can’t let go and move on when the time’s right.
8
Stop insisting on having everything your way. Instead, wish for things to happen exactly as they do. Yeah, you heard that right. Embrace the chaos, the mess, the unplanned. When you stop trying to make the universe your personal puppet, something awesome happens: you start to enjoy the show.
It’s about letting go of that ‘must-have-it-my-way’ attitude and accepting the ride as it is. When you stop fighting every twist and turn, you start enjoying the journey.
9
You’ve got a cold? Sucks for your body, sure, but your mind? Not so much, unless you decide to make it a big deal. Twisted your ankle? Yep, that’s a bummer for walking, but your ability to choose your attitude? It’s unharmed.
Stuff happens to us; illness, injuries (or COVID-19). But they’re roadblocks for parts of us, not all of us. Your body might be down for the day, but your mind? That’s still strong. The real power lies in your choice on how you react to these setbacks.
So next time life throws a wrench in your plans, like a flu or a twisted ankle, remember it’s just messing with a part of you, not all of you. Your choice, your will, your attitude. All that is still yours. These physical setbacks are just speed bumps, not roadblocks.
10
Here’s the thing: No matter what life throws at you, always ask yourself, ‘How can I handle this?’ Let’s say you’re scrolling through Instagram, and BAM! You see your ex in Bali with someone new. Ouch. But wait, check your mental toolbox. There’s self-control, right next to the unfollow button. Use it.
Or say you’re slammed with back-to-back Zoom meetings, and your Wi-Fi is not working. Before you throw your laptop out the window, remember your toolbox. Ah, there’s endurance, sitting next to your coffee mug. That’s what you need to get through the day. Or someone cuts you off in traffic or snaps at you in line at the coffee shop? That’s when you need patience.
It’s all about using the right mental tool for the situation. Just like you wouldn’t use a hammer to fix a computer, don’t let your emotions run wild for every little thing life throws at you. Stay in control and choose your response.
11
Stop saying you ‘lost’ something and start saying you ‘gave it back’. Your phone gets stolen? Nope, you just gave it back to the universe. That job you got fired from? The universe just took its thing back, no biggie. Your relationship ended? That’s just life’s way of saying it’s time to give that love back. Everything you have is like a Netflix subscription, not really yours, just on loan. You enjoy it while it lasts, but when the subscription ends, it’s not a crisis, it’s just something you had that’s now gone back to where it came from.
And if you’re pissed at the jerk who took your phone or job away from you, don’t sweat it. It’s not your problem how the universe decides to reclaim its stuff. Your task? To be the best damn borrower you can be while you’ve got the chance.
That’s the approach to take with everything in life. Cherish it while it’s with you, take good care of it, but always be ready for the moment when it’s time to say goodbye.
12
Want to level up in life? Then start rejecting thoughts like, ‘If I don’t work 24/7, I’m gonna be broke,’ or ‘If I don’t keep everyone in line, everything will fall apart.’ It’s way better to live a simpler life, free from all that stress and anxiety, than to be rolling in dough but losing your mind.
And hey, if your intern messes up a report or your roommate forgets to do the dishes? Big whoop. It’s way healthier for you to be cool with imperfection than to be a perpetual ball of anger. Start with the small annoyances. Spilled coffee on your new shirt? Lost a few bucks? That’s the universe’s price tag for staying sane. Remember, nothing awesome comes for free.
When you’re dealing with people, like asking your co-worker for help, keep your cool if they screw up. Why? Because your peace of mind isn’t, and shouldn’t be, hinged on their actions. It’s on you. So, the world’s gonna world. Stuff will happen. People will be people. Your job? To not let that turn you into a human tornado of stress. Keep your cool, and the world keeps spinning. It’s all about trading a little discomfort for a whole lot of peace.
13
If you really want to make progress, be cool with looking like you don’t have all the answers. Stop trying to be Mr. or Ms. Know-It-All. And if someone starts thinking you’re the next big thing, it’s time to give yourself a reality check.
Balancing staying true to yourself (that’s the ‘nature’ part) while chasing all the shiny things out there is like trying to text and drive (it’s a very bad idea). Focus too much on keeping up appearances, and you’ll lose sight of what really matters: your own values and integrity.
You focus on one, you’re gonna mess up the other. So, if you’re aiming for real progress, forget about impressing others with your vast knowledge or your Insta-worthy lifestyle. Let people think you’re a bit clueless or off-trend. Stay real, and let the world think what it wants. You’ll be busy living your best life, which is way cooler than just looking cool.
14
Wishing for your family and friends to live forever? That’s like wishing your phone battery would never die (nice thought, but not happening). It’s out of your control. You’re wishing for the impossible, and that’s a one-way ticket to being disappointed.
And expecting your kids and coworkers to never screw up? Forget it. Imperfection is part of the human package, you’re expecting chocolate to not taste like chocolate. It just doesn’t make sense.
But here’s something you can actually do: Focus on not letting your wants and fears run your life. That’s totally in your power. But if your happiness hinges on getting that promotion, or your kid getting into Harvard, you’re basically handing your peace of mind over to someone else. Stop it. Stop letting your happiness depend on things other people control.
15
Think of life like a buffet. You’re chilling at the table, and all these platters of opportunities and experiences are being passed around. First, when something awesome comes your way – a job offer, a chance to travel, whatever – reach out and grab it. But do it with class, no elbowing your way in. Now, if that platter of opportunity moves past you, don’t sweat it. Don’t cling desperately or throw a tantrum. There’s plenty more coming, just be patient. And what if that killer opportunity hasn’t even made it to you yet? Chill. Don’t drool over it from afar or stretch yourself out of shape trying to grab it. Just wait your turn.
Same rule applies to the big stuff: family, career, money. When they come your way, welcome them. If they pass you by, let them go. Haven’t got them yet? Just wait. And if you can look at all these goodies and go, ‘Meh, I don’t need this,’ even when everyone else is piling their plates high, that’s when you’re playing on a whole new level. This is what made guys like Diogenes and Heraclitus so great.
In the end, life isn’t about grabbing every single thing in sight. It’s about choosing your shots wisely. Sometimes, the real flex is saying no to the easy stuff and waiting out for the big wins. It’s about running the show, not letting the buffet of life push you around.
16
Let’s say your friend is in full panic mode: kids are driving them nuts, work’s a mess, and their partner just cheated.
But the issue isn’t the chaos itself. It’s the way your friend’s looking at it. One person’s dumpster fire is another’s flickering candle. It’s all about the perspective.
Now, don’t go full robot mode. Feel free to say, ‘Man, that sucks,’ and give them a shoulder to cry on. Show them you’re there. But don’t let yourself get dragged into their drama. Remember, it’s their storm, not yours. You’re just there to hand them an umbrella, not to get soaked yourself.
17
Think of life as this wild, unpredictable play, and you’re one of the actors. The script? It’s not in your hands. It’s being written by something bigger; call it fate, the universe, whatever. Your job is to roll with it.
So, the universe decides your play is a short, snappy comedy? Rock that stage. Or maybe it’s a long, epic drama? Own every scene. What if you’re cast as the underdog, the one who’s always struggling? Bring it on. Or maybe you’re the high-flying executive, or just the average Joe? Whatever the role, your mission is to nail it.
You don’t get to pick your part. That’s for the big director in the sky. But how you play that part; that’s on you. Whether you’re the lead or in the background, your job is to give it everything you’ve got.
Don’t get hung up on the role you’re handed. Some people spend their whole lives wishing they were playing someone else’s part. Big mistake. The real trick is to take whatever role you get and make it freaking unforgettable.
18
Imagine life throws some classic ‘bad luck’ things at you. Not old-school ravens, but stuff like your laptop crashing during a crucial Zoom meeting, or your car breaking down on the way to an interview.
Don’t freak out over this stuff. That’s not the universe out to get you. That’s just tech being tech and machines being machines. This crap isn’t personal; it’s just part of the chaos of life.
Flip the script and decide that every omen, every sign, is actually in your favour. Why? Because you’ve got the power to turn whatever happens into a win. Missed the bus? More time to listen to your favourite podcast. Internet’s down? Perfect chance to disconnect and chill for 5 minutes.
Remember very so-called bad omen is an opportunity if you choose to see it that way.
19
You’re unbeatable if you don’t waste your time competing in battles you can’t win. Don’t get all twisted when you see someone else getting the glory, power or likes on social media. Just because they’re getting the spotlight doesn’t mean they’ve got the secret to happiness.
If real happiness comes from stuff you can control – like your actions, your reactions, your mindset, then why the hell waste time being jealous or envious? You shouldn’t be craving titles or chasing clout, but something way cooler: being totally, unapologetically free.
And there’s only one route to that kind of freedom: not caring too much about the things you can’t control. That job promotion you didn’t get, the fancy car you don’t have, the VIP invites that never come – if it’s not in your control, it’s not worth your worry. That’s the key to winning at life – focusing on what really matters, not the flashy distractions.
20
You’re in a situation where someone’s being a total jerk. Some dude cuts you off in traffic or a coworker throws shade your way. Your first reaction? Your blood’s boiling, you’re about to lose it. But wait. It’s not them getting under your skin; it’s your own brain telling you, “Hey, this is an insult.” It’s your own thinking that’s firing up the irritation.
So, what do you do? You hit pause. Take a step back and ask yourself, “Is this really worth my energy?” Most times, it’s not. That’s how you start to take control. You’re not letting the world or that annoying person dictate your mood. You’re in charge.
21
Take a moment each day to reflect on all the stuff that scares the crap out of you. Getting fired from your job, ending up alone and yeah, even dying. All of it. Why? Because it puts everything into perspective.
When you’re constantly aware that the clock’s ticking, you won’t waste time on petty crap. You won’t find yourself getting sucked into meaningless drama or chasing after stuff that doesn’t really matter.
If you keep reminding yourself that you’re not here forever, you won’t spend your days sweating the small stuff. You’ll live bigger, bolder, without sweating over whether you’re wearing the right brand or if you’ve got the latest iPhone.
It’s about getting real with the fact that we’re all on a one-way trip. You start being grateful for the now, for the messy, beautiful ride that is life.
22
Let’s say you decide to do something new. You decide to learn more about philosophy, or start a podcast or you decide to go vegan.
Just be ready for the eye rolls. Some people may be like, “Look who thinks they’re Joe Rogan now,” or “Oh, suddenly we’ve got a plant-based guru here.”
Don’t let that get to you. Don’t start acting all superior and preachy about your new thing either. Just do your thing, as if the universe itself handed you this mission.
Stay true to your thing, and the very people who mocked you will end up respecting you. They’ll be hitting you up for podcast tips or vegan recipes before you know it. But if you let them get to you, if you bail on your thing because of a few laughs, you’ll be the one kicking yourself later.
23
If you find yourself chasing after stuff just to impress or please someone else, guess what? You’ve totally lost the plot. You’re not living your life anymore; you’re just a puppet in someone else’s show. You’re trading in your authentic self for cheap applause.
Stick to your own script. You’re the philosopher, the trendsetter, the whatever-you-want-to-be in your own life story.
Lets say you want people to see you as a deep thinker, a philosopher, or a wise soul: don’t just stand there with a sign saying ‘Look at me, I’m so philosophical.’ Prove it. Live it. Your actions, your choices, your daily life should scream it louder than any words could.
24
Don’t stress over the following things:
- Chasing Recognition: You’re freaking out because you think you’ll end up a nobody, not getting the respect or the VIP invites? Chill. Being honoured or dishonoured isn’t about what others do or think about you. It’s about what you do and think about yourself. Craving positions of power or social status is like chasing your tail: exhausting and pointless. You being a nobody? That’s impossible, unless you decide to be one in the areas you actually control, like your integrity, your actions, your values.
- Helping Friends and Country: What does helping really mean? Is it about giving money or favours? No. It’s about being there, being reliable, without sacrificing your integrity. If you can lend a hand while staying true to your values, awesome. But if it means compromising your principles, it’s a hard pass. What’s more valuable: a friend who’s rich but shady, or one who’s broke but rock-solid?
- Your Role in Society: Find where you fit, but don’t lose yourself in the process. If you have to sell out to be a part of something, then you’re not helping at all. You’re just another cog in the machine. It’s like trying to put out a fire with gasoline, it just doesn’t work.
It’s not about being rich, famous, or influential. It’s about sticking to what makes you, you. It’s about integrity, self-respect, and authenticity. That’s where you make a real difference – not by how many people know your name, but by how true you are to your values.
25
So, you’re at a party and someone else is getting the VIP treatment: the best seat, the special shoutout, the whole A-Z. And there you are, holding your regular drink, feeling like chopped liver.
- When Others Get the Perks: If these perks are genuinely good, then good for them. But if it’s all just fluff and nonsense, then why the hell would you even want it? Remember, if you’re not playing the same suck-up game as everyone else, don’t expect the same rewards.
- The Price of Popularity: Why’s that other guy getting all the attention? Because he’s paying the price like hanging around the right doors, dishing out compliments like candy. If you’re not doing the same, why would you expect the same treatment?
- The Real Cost: You weren’t invited to the big dinner party? Well, did you stroke the host’s ego or dance to his tune? No? Then why expect an invite? He’s trading invites for ego boosts. If you don’t want to play that game, then don’t whine about not getting a seat at the table.
- What You Gain Instead: You missed out on the fancy dinner. Big deal. What did you keep? Your dignity, for one. You didn’t have to suck up to someone you don’t respect. You didn’t have to deal with the snobs at the door. That’s worth more than any five-course meal.
In short, everything has a price. If you’re not willing to pay it, don’t expect the goods. And sometimes, what you keep by not paying is worth way more than what you’d gain.
26
Life’s like a giant mirror reflecting the same stuff back at us, but we react differently depending on whether it’s happening to us or someone else.
Take the broken cup scenario. Your buddy’s clumsy kid drops a cup, and it shatters. You’re like, ‘Eh, stuff happens.’ But when your favorite mug hits the floor, suddenly it’s a Greek tragedy. Why the drama? It’s the same broken cup.
Now, let’s raise the stakes. Someone else loses a family member, and you’re all philosophical, saying, ‘That’s life.’ But when tragedy hits you, it’s like the world should stop and mourn with you. Sure, it hurts more when it’s personal, but the event is the same.
We need to start reacting to our own cups breaking, our own losses, like we do when it’s someone else’s. It’s not about being cold-hearted. It’s about perspective.
27
The world isn’t out to get you. We often see stuff around us as ‘bad’ or ‘negative.’ But in reality, the universe isn’t out there plotting our downfall. It’s not like every morning, it decides, ‘Let’s make some bad stuff happen to this guy.’ No. The universe is neutral; it’s our perceptions that label things as good or bad.
So, next time something seemingly crappy happens, remember: it’s not a cosmic sign that the universe is against you. It’s just a thing that happened. Your job is to deal with it, learn from it, maybe even laugh at it, but not to see it as a deliberate act of a hostile universe.
28
Imagine if someone could just hand your body over to any random person on the street. You’d be outraged, right? But you’re doing exactly that with your mind every time you let someone’s crap comments or attitude get to you.
Think about it. Some jerk says something rude, and suddenly you’re all twisted up inside. Why? Because you just handed over the keys to your mental state. That’s just nuts.
It’s like letting someone else drive your car while you’re helplessly sitting in the backseat. And not just anyone, but someone who doesn’t give a damn about where you want to go or how you want to get there.
So, next time someone tries to throw you off with their nonsense, remember your mind is your territory. Don’t let every Tom, Dick, or Harry who crosses your path mess with your head.
29
Before you jump into something new, like starting a YouTube channel or training for a marathon, you’ve got to look at the whole picture. It’s easy to get hyped at the beginning, thinking you’ll be the next big YouTuber or cross the finish line in record time. But hold up.
Don’t just start in because it sounds cool. Think about what it actually takes. Want to start vlogging? Get ready for long hours of filming, editing, dealing with trolls in the comments, and maybe not hitting it big right away. Training for that marathon? Say goodbye to lazy Sundays, and get ready for sore muscles, strict diets, and running in crappy weather.
It’s like wanting to be a rock star without considering the years of playing in dingy bars or dreaming of starting a business without thinking about the grind of 18-hour workdays. You’ve got to look at the not-so-glamorous parts too.
So, before you jump into something, think it through. Do you really want to deal with all the crap that comes with it? Or are you just caught up in the hype? It’s about being real with yourself. Don’t be like a kid who switches from wanting to be an astronaut one week to a pop star the next.
If you’re going after something, be ready for the suck that comes with it. It’s not just about the shiny end goal. It’s the grind, the setbacks, and the unsexy parts that really test whether you want it or not. Decide if you’re in for the whole ride, not just the fun parts. That’s what separates the wannabes from the real deals.
30
Relations define duties.
Your father’s giving you a hard time? Maybe he’s not the ‘Father of the Year,’ but guess what? He’s still your dad. Your part in this isn’t about deciding whether he’s good or bad at dad-ing; it’s about you doing your bit as the son or daughter.
And your brother’s being a jerk? Okay, but he’s still your brother. It’s not about keeping score on who’s wronged who more. It’s about you staying true to your role in that relationship, keeping your cool and your integrity.
Nobody can really get under your skin unless you let them. When you think someone’s hurt you, that’s on you. You’re the one giving them the power to mess with your head.
So, how do you deal with family drama, annoying neighbours, or a boss who’s a nightmare? Stop focusing on their actions. Focus on yours. How can you respond in a way that keeps you in line with your values, your nature?
31
When it comes to the big cosmic questions, like your take on the gods or the universe, the key thing is to keep your beliefs straight. Think of the universe (or these forces) as wise and just, running the show in a way that’s way beyond our pay grade. Your job? Go with the flow, believing there’s a reason behind it all.
Stop labeling stuff as good or bad, especially the things out of your control. We’re all wired to dodge pain and chase pleasure. But if you start thinking you’re being screwed over by some cosmic force, you’re just setting yourself up for misery.
And when it comes to showing respect or following traditions – prayers, offerings, rituals – do them, but make sure they mean something to you. It’s not about how much you spend or how grand your gestures are. It’s about what’s in your heart when you’re doing them.
Keep your head on straight about the big stuff, focus on what’s in your control, and when you engage in traditions, make it count.
32
When you’re turning to things like horoscopes, tarot cards, or any kind of fortune-telling, remember this: You’re looking for answers about stuff you don’t control. If something’s out of your hands, it’s neither good nor bad. It just is.
Don’t get all worried or hopeful about what the fortune-teller’s going to tell you. Whether it’s about winning the lottery or finding your soulmate, it’s all the same. It’s not in your control, so it’s not something to lose sleep over.
Whatever comes up, it’s not going to make or break your world. The real power is in how you use what happens, not in the prediction itself. No one, no card, no stars can stop you from turning any situation to your advantage.
33
Starting now, adopt a personality and a style of behaviour that you can maintain reliably, whether you’re by yourself or with other people.
- Talk Less, Listen More: Be intentional with your words and actions. Don’t waste your breath on everyday nonsense like celebrity gossip or who won the game last night. And most importantly always refrain from gossiping about people.
- Laugh Gently: Don’t be the person who laughs at everything or the one who’s always got a dramatic story to tell. It’s like being that guy at the party who tries too hard – just don’t.
- Swear Less: And about swearing? Just skip it.
- Pick Friends Wisely: Be careful about who you hang out with. Spending time with the wrong crowd can lead you to pick up bad habits.
- Live Simply: When it comes to living well, it’s like picking your diet – go for what you need, not for what’s flashy or excessive. Keep your lifestyle real and grounded. Skip the fancy stuff that’s just for show.
- Mind Your Business: Don’t be that guy who’s always preaching about their choices or lifestyle. You’re choosing to wait or be selective? Good. But don’t turn into this preachy, holier-than-thou type, giving everyone a speech about your choices. It’s like those people who won’t shut up about their Keto diet at a pizza party. Great for you, but you don’t need to make it everyone else’s deal.
- Handle Criticism Like a Pro: If someone criticizes you, don’t rush to defend yourself. Throw them off by agreeing and pointing out that they missed some of your other flaws
- Be Cool at Sports Events: Avoid getting too wrapped up in things like sports or TV shows. If you do indulge, don’t lose your cool over it. Be the guy who’s there for the experience, not for the fanfare.
- Be Chill at Lectures: When it comes to stuff like public readings or seminars, don’t just show up to every single one. But if you do go, keep it classy. Don’t be that guy in the back scrolling through his phone or heckling the speaker. It’s like going to a movie and spending the whole time making loud comments – nobody likes that guy.
- Meeting Someone Important? When you’re meeting someone important, don’t get all starstruck or psyched out. Ask yourself, “What would a cool-headed philosopher like Socrates do?” This isn’t about impressing the big guy in the room; it’s about handling yourself with composure, regardless of who’s in the room. It’s like meeting a celebrity – play it cool, don’t go fanboy on them.
- Don’t Overshare Your Stories: Your adventures might not be as thrilling to others as they are to you. Sure, your skydiving story is cool, but don’t turn into that person who can’t stop talking about themselves.
- Avoid Making Jokes at Others’ Expense: Trying too hard to be funny can sometimes lead to saying something you might regret later.
- Mind Your Language: If someone else is using bad language, you can either tell them it’s not cool or just show you don’t like it by staying quiet.
34
You know that rush you get when something feels really good? Could be anything – a slice of triple chocolate cake, a crazy Black Friday deal, a flirtatious text from someone you shouldn’t be texting. Don’t let that initial buzz mess with your brain.
Take a step back. Hit the pause button. Think about the two roads ahead: one, where you dive into that pleasure, and the other, where you might end up regretting it big time. Yeah, that cake might taste like heaven now, but how will you feel when your jeans don’t fit next week?
Now, imagine how proud you’ll feel if you skip the cake or ignore that text. Remember, there’s a bigger high in conquering your cravings than in giving in to them. You’re in control, not your fleeting cravings.
But hey, if there’s a legit good moment to go for it, don’t be a robot about it. Just be sure you’re not getting seduced by the shiny wrapping and missing the consequences. Every time you resist a short-lived pleasure for a better cause, you’re scoring a victory. That’s the real pleasure, the one that comes from knowing you’re the boss of your own decisions.
35
If you’ve decided to do something and you know it’s the right thing, then own it. Don’t sneak around or hide just because you think others might not like it.
Think about it. If what you’re doing feels wrong, then why the hell are you doing it? But if you know deep down it’s the right call, then stand tall and do it with confidence. Whether it’s quitting a cushy job to start your own thing, or choosing a path less traveled that everyone else thinks is nuts, if it’s right for you, that’s all that matters.
So, next time you’re about to do something and you start worrying about the side-eye or the whispers, ask yourself: ‘Is this right for me?’ If the answer’s yes, then go ahead and let the haters hate. They’re not living your life, you are (:
36
Saying “It’s daytime” makes sense on its own, just like saying “It’s nighttime” does. But if you try to say both at the same time, it gets confusing, right? They just don’t fit together.
Just like that, when you’re at a dinner, sure, you could go all in, hogging the best and biggest portions. But that’s missing half the picture. Look, it’s not just about filling your stomach. It’s about the whole scene: the company, the conversation, the person who invited you. It’s like being on a date and spending the whole time on your phone. Yeah, you’re physically there, but you’re missing the point.
So next time you’re dining with others, remember it’s not just about satisfying your stomach. It’s about being a decent dinner companion, showing some respect to your host, and understanding social etiquette. It’s about being aware of the situation and knowing that being a good guest is just as important as enjoying a good meal.
37
Trying to be someone you’re not? That’s a one-way ticket to fail. You play a role that’s way out of your league, and not only are you going to suck at it, but you’ll also miss out on nailing something you’re actually good at.
It’s like if you spend all your time trying to write a bestseller when you could’ve been killing it writing killer blog posts or short stories.
Play to your strengths. Don’t chase some impossible ideal just because it looks cool or because everyone else is doing it. Find what you’re good at, what fits you, and go all in on that.
38
You know how you watch your step to avoid stepping on something nasty or twisting your ankle? Apply that same caution to protect your mind: your ‘ruling center.’
Every day, you’re dodging physical stuff that could trip you up. But what about the mental traps? The toxic thoughts, the stress bombs, the negativity nails just waiting to puncture your peace of mind.
Whether it’s getting into pointless arguments online, stewing over someone else’s success, or worrying about things you can’t control, make sure you are ‘aware.’
Be just as vigilant with your thoughts and emotions as you are with where you step.
When you’re mindful of where you’re putting your mental energy, just like you watch your physical steps, you’re less likely to end up in a mental mess.
39
Imagine your body is like a measuring stick for what you really need in life. Just like your foot determines the size of your shoe, your real needs should determine your possessions. Stick to this, and you’re golden. But once you start wanting more and more, just for the heck of it, you’re heading for a fall – like off a cliff.
Think about it. You start with a basic pair of shoes that fit just right. But then you think, ‘Hey, wouldn’t it be cool to have fancier shoes?’ So, you get some flashy ones, then even flashier ones.
If you keep wanting more: bigger houses, fancier cars, more gadgets. You’ll never be satisfied. It’s a never-ending race, and the finish line keeps moving. You end up chasing stuff without even knowing why.
40
When girls hit their teens, our society starts defining their value and worth based on their physical attractiveness. This outdated notion pushes them to focus solely on their appearance, as if their only worth lies in attracting someone else.
But it’s bullshit. It’s like telling someone their only value is in how many Instagram likes they get. Women, just like men, are worth way more than just their looks or their ability to be someone’s partner.
This isn’t just a women’s issue; it’s a societal one. We should be encouraging everyone, regardless of gender, to focus on qualities like integrity, strength, and respect, not just on looking good for others.
41
Obsessing over body-related things, like going overboard with exercise, eating too much, drinking, or getting too caught up in your bathroom and bedroom activities is a sign you’re missing the point.
Stop making your life all about the physical stuff. Sure, hitting the gym, enjoying good food, and the rest are part of life, but they shouldn’t be your whole life. It’s cool to stay fit, enjoy good food, have a few drinks, and live your love life. But if you’re pouring all your energy into just your body, you’re letting your brain – your most powerful tool collect dust.
Balance is key. Read, think, learn, debate. Grow your mind as you grow your body. That’s how you build a life that’s not just about looking good or having fun, but also about being smart, insightful, and truly alive.
42
When someone’s giving you a hard time like talking trash about you or treating you badly. Remember, they’re doing that because, in their twisted view, it seems like the right thing to do. It’s not about you; it’s about their perception of what’s right and wrong, which might be totally out of whack.
People can’t always see things from your point of view. They’re operating on their own, often messed-up, wavelength. If they’re getting it wrong, they’re the ones losing out, living in their own bubble of bad judgment.
If someone’s judgment is skewed, who really loses out? They do. They’re living in a world based on false assumptions. Like, if someone thinks 2 + 2 equals 5, the math isn’t wrong; they are.
So, next time someone comes at you with negativity or nonsense, don’t take it personally. Just think, ‘Well, that’s how they see it.’ It’s not about agreeing with them; it’s about understanding where they’re coming from and not letting it mess with your peace.
43
Every situation is like a kettle with two handles. One handle is super hot. Touch it, and you get burned. The other handle? It’s cool, safe to grab. You can either grab the handle that burns you or the one that lets you carry it without getting hurt.
Let’s say your brother or someone close to you is giving you a hard time, really getting under your skin. You’ve got two ways to handle it. One way is to focus on the hurt, the betrayal – that’s the hot handle. Grab that, and all you get is pain.
But here’s the cool handle: He’s your brother. You grew up together. You’ve shared a lot. When you grab this handle, you’re choosing to see the bigger picture, the deeper connection. It doesn’t excuse his bad behaviour, but it changes how you deal with it.
This approach isn’t about ignoring the wrong or letting people walk all over you. It’s about choosing a perspective that lets you handle the heat without getting burned. It’s recognizing that there’s more to the story than just this one crappy moment.
44
Just because someone has more money than you or can speak better, doesn’t mean they’re a better person than you. It’s like saying, “I have more apples than you, so I’m better,” or “I can run faster, so I’m superior.” Nonsense. What it really means is just that: they have more of something or can do something better.
The trap a lot of people fall into is thinking that their worth is tied to what they have or how they sound. That’s like measuring your life’s value by the size of your TV or the brand of your car. It’s shallow and, frankly, pretty sad.
You are not your bank account, your car, your house, or your eloquence. You’re a whole lot more. Your value comes from who you are as a person: your actions, your character, your kindness, your resilience.
45
See people’s actions for what they are, and don’t jump to judge their character based on those actions.
So, someone’s rushing through their laundry or dishes? Don’t label them as sloppy. They’re just in a hurry. Or is someone drinking a lot of wine? Don’t slap them with the label of being a bad drinker; they’re just drinking a lot.
The point is, you don’t know what’s behind their actions until you understand their reasons. Just like you can’t judge a song based on one lyric or a movie on one scene.
So, next time you see someone doing something that seems off, hit pause on the judgment. Life isn’t just Instagram stories and TikTok clips; it’s more complex. Get the full story before deciding what’s up.
46
Don’t go around calling yourself a philosopher or a guru, especially in casual settings like parties or social gatherings. It’s not about talking a big game on life’s big questions; it’s about living those answers.
Take a dinner party, for instance. Don’t lecture everyone on how they should eat; just eat right yourself. Show, don’t tell.
Remember Socrates? He was so real about his philosophy that he didn’t even bother to announce it. When people asked to meet philosophers, he just introduced them to others. No ego. No spotlight.
So, if you find yourself in a chat about, say, the meaning of life or the latest self-help trend, don’t jump in to prove how much you know. There’s a risk you’ll end up spewing half-baked ideas you haven’t fully understood yourself.
The real test, like Socrates knew, is being cool when someone says you don’t know anything. That’s when you know you’re actually getting somewhere. It’s not about showing off how much you know; it’s about what you do with that knowledge.
47
Let’s say you’ve scaled down your life to the basics and are into simple living. That’s great. But for the love of God, don’t walk around blabbering about your minimalist lifestyle. Seriously, nobody gives a shit if your only beverage choice is water.
And this whole ‘I’m training to be tough’ routine? Do it for yourself, not for the Instagram likes. You’re not a damn superhero because you can deny yourself a latte or sleep on the floor. You are doing this for your own self-discipline.
And during those times when you really want to test your limits: take a mouthful of ice-cold water and then spit it out. Don’t drink it. This about testing your self-discipline. But when you do this, do it quietly. Don’t announce it in front of everyone. Find joy in the simple, quiet moments of your life. It’s not about others noticing or patting you on the back. It’s not about the attention or the likes. It’s about being content with the simpler, quieter aspects of life. You don’t need validation for every little thing you do. It’s about enjoying your water, your workout, and your simple joys, without needing a spotlight on them.
48
This is the difference between your average Joe and someone who’s really got their stuff together, philosophically speaking:
The average person thinks everything good or bad comes from outside, like getting a promotion or stuck in traffic. But a true philosopher? They know the real deal happens inside. Your wins and losses are all about how you handle stuff, not just what life throws at you.
Now, what are the signs you’re on the right track?
First, you stop judging others. No trash-talking, no putting people on pedestals. You don’t waste time pointing fingers or singing praises. And a big one: you don’t go around bragging about how great or knowledgeable you are.
When someone throws compliments your way, you don’t take it too seriously. And if someone’s dissing you? You don’t bother defending yourself. You’re more like someone recovering from an injury, being super careful not to mess up the healing process.
The goal is to drop all those wild desires and focus on what you can actually control. You’re cool, calm, and collected, no matter what you’re aiming for. And if people think you’re a bit off or clueless? So be it. You’re more focused on keeping an eye on yourself, making sure you don’t trip yourself up.
49
It’s silly to get all proud just because you can understand some complex philosopher like Chrysippus.
So what if you can decode some ancient philosopher’s writing? Big deal. If the guy had written clearly, you wouldn’t have anything to brag about. The real deal isn’t about just understanding complex stuff. It’s about what you do with that understanding.
Let’s say you wanted to understand nature and life and you hear Chrysippus is the man. You check out his work, but it’s like reading a foreign language. So, you find someone to break it down for you. Cool, but there’s no trophy for just getting that far.
Where you can start patting yourself on the back is when you start living out those teachings. Otherwise, what’s the point? You’re just a walking encyclopedia, not someone who’s actually living philosophically. It’s like memorizing a cookbook but never cooking a meal.
When someone asks you to explain Chrysippus and you can’t show how his ideas have changed your life, it’s embarrassing, not impressive. It’s like being able to quote every self-help book but still being a mess.
The real achievement isn’t in understanding complex theories; it’s in applying them to your life. It’s about action, not just knowledge.
50
Look, when it comes to the rules you’ve set for yourself, treat them like they’re set in stone. It’s like making a personal constitution; once you’ve decided on your principles, stick to them as if breaking them is a cardinal sin. It’s about having that kind of hardcore commitment to what you believe is right.
And as for what people say about you? Screw that. It’s none of your business. People will yap about anything and everything, and if you start paying attention to every whisper or shout about you, you’ll go nuts.
51
Wake up! How much longer are you going to wait before you start living like you give a damn about yourself? You’ve got all the knowledge, you know what you should be doing, so what’s holding you? Are you waiting for some magical guru to appear and fix all your problems? Get real. You’re not some clueless kid anymore; you’re all grown up.
If you keep slacking off, saying ‘I’ll start tomorrow,’ or ‘next Monday,’ or ‘January 1st,’ guess what? You’re just bullshitting yourself. You’ll stay stuck where you are, forever an amateur, until you die. It’s harsh but true. So, decide right now that you’re going to start living like a grown adult who’s serious about making progress.
Make your ideals non-negotiable. If something’s hard, if it’s fun, if it makes you look good or bad, doesn’t matter. No more delays. Your actions today decide whether you’re moving forward or just spinning your wheels.
Look at Socrates. That dude was a legend because he paid no attention to anything other than sticking to his reason and principles. You might not be Socrates, but you can damn well start living like you aim to be. That’s the attitude. No more excuses, no more waiting. It’s time to step up.
52
There are three parts to philosophy.
The first and most crucial part of philosophy is learning how to live by certain principles, like not lying.
The second part involves understanding the reasons behind these principles, such as why we shouldn’t lie.
The third part is about digging deeper and questioning the logic behind everything, like what constitutes a lie, the nature of truth and falsehood, and so on.
But we often get so caught up in this third part, the nitty-gritty of philosophical analysis, that we totally miss the point. We end up spending all our time dissecting and debating these concepts, rather than actually living by the principles we’ve learned.
Look, philosophy isn’t just about sitting around and talking big. It’s about what you do, not just what you know. It’s easy to get lost in the words, debating why you shouldn’t lie or what truth really means. But that’s all fairies and rainbows if you’re not actually living by those principles. The most important part of philosophy is the stuff you actually put into practice, the stuff you use on a day-to-day basis. That’s your bread and butter. The rest? It’s like intellectual garnish.
We often get obsessed with the complicated, navel-gazing part of philosophy – debating, proving, and dissecting ideas. But what’s the point if you know all the reasons not to lie, yet you lie every day?
Philosophy isn’t just for show; it’s for living. It’s not about how well you can argue in a debate or how much you can impress others with your knowledge. It’s about how you live your life on a day-to-day basis.
53
On every occasion, we should keep these powerful ideas in our minds:
“Guide me, Zeus, and you too, Destiny, lead the way.
Wherever your command has destined me, I will follow without doubt.
And even if I hesitate, or I am reluctant and struggling,
I will still follow your path.”
This is a reminder from Cleanthes, emphasizing surrender and trust in the universe’s plan, even when we’re hesitant or unwilling.
“Those who gracefully accept what’s necessary,
In matters of the divine, we deem them wise and knowledgeable.”
This quote from Euripides suggests that wisdom comes from accepting and complying with the inevitable, especially in spiritual or divine matters.
“Well, Crito, if this is what the gods want, let it be so.”
From Plato’s ‘Crito,’ this line reflects a calm acceptance of divine will, suggesting that aligning with what the gods deem right is a form of wisdom.
“Anytus and Meletus can kill me, but they cannot harm me.”
Also from Plato, but this time from ‘Apology,’ it’s a statement about the distinction between physical harm and true spiritual or moral harm. It implies that while others may have power over our physical state, our inner integrity and moral standing remain untouched unless we allow it.
These quotes collectively teach us about the importance of aligning with a greater purpose, accepting the inevitability of certain events, and distinguishing between physical harm and moral integrity.